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How to squeeze the kumquats and thunk the two-legged melons
By: James M. Abraham's
Charlotte Sun
There are many single folks out there still looking for their mystery date to show up.
But take it from Lynn McDonald, however--the waiting game seldom translates into the dating game. If it's a mate you seek, you may have to
get out there and work to find one. Fortunately, McDonald offers woman a safe, comfortable way to launch that safari of the heart. Her book's
title, "How to Use Your Shopping Skills to Get a Man," speaks for itself.
The Sarasota motivational speaker, who may be familiar to some Charlotte County readers, brings the same level of humor and energy to
her book that she exhibits in personal appearances.
McDonald starts the book off with an anecdote about a quick trip to the store for some coffee and milk. Somehow or other, she wound up
staggering back to her car with a load of stuff she never intended to buy. She realized she had gone into the store hungry and without a plan,
and consequently was ambushed by the sights, smells and sales.
That led her to apply her revelation to that most exacting of shopping trips, the search for a lover. In her book, she begins her lesson by
asking readers to clean out their closets.
As many of us know, the best intentions are often mislaid in messy closets, among all the stuff that we don't use but can't seem to throw
away. Try applying the same labels you would to clothing to men, McDonald advises.
For example, the old leather jacket that once looked so cool just doesn't cut it anymore. After all, you wouldn't be caught dead wearing
palazzo pants in the New Millennium. Similarly, Mr. High School Sweetie, complete in his letterman jacket, isn't what you need in your more
mature years.
Just as women often buy solely because the rack is marked at 50 percent off, McDonald writes, they often settle for less in their choice of
men folk because the guy they bring home takes little effort to snare. But, as we all know, some bargains wind up costing a lot more than if
we had paid a premium for the same item.
You get the drift.
There are few things scary than dating. After all, when we seek the object of affection, we must sell ourselves, placing our hearts on our
sleeves and our souls on display. And there are many sharks out there, human hammerheads who would use the weakness inherent in our
honest displays of affection to wound us.
But what's a lonely person to do? As Emerson said, to find a friend one must be a friend. In other words, one must cast one's net if the object
is gathering fish.
That's what makes McDonald's book so valuable. Her message is that women seeking men must first plan. Don't go to the same old places
or do the same old thing, she urges. Understand your value, writes McDonald, and adjust your expectations accordingly. Find out what you
like and dislike, and find a milieu where your preferences prevail.
To return to the market analogy, consider how good shoppers write out their lists so that they group all their dairy products together; while
placing meats, dry goods and other such commodities in their own sections of the list. If you're tired of hams, you wouldn't volunteer at the
community theater to get a man. However, if it's beef you want, what's wrong with checking out the sports bar when the championship game
Reservacion de alojamiento Stuttgartis being televised?
McDonald's central point? The easiest way to get to Heartbreak Hotel is by not planning one's route. A lack of planning can often make the
seducer the seduced.
McDonald's solid advice is of value, and the humor and funny graphics help make her book a keeper. And, despite the feminine pronouns
scattered throughout the book, "Shopping Skills" is a book men could use as well.
To order her book, go to www.shoppingskills.com.
McDonald knows of what she speaks. "Shopping Skills" can be any person's guide to finding the Right One. Besides, it sure is a fun read!
To read more of James M. Abraham's book essays, buy "Come Read With Me," a compilation of his columns, available at local bookstores.
Shop til They drop
Bologna hotelsBy Kim Cool
Features Editor
Venice Gondolier Sun
With the advice in Lynn McDonald¹s new book, How to Use Your Shopping Skills to Get a Man finding the perfect man should be easier
than selecting the perfect melon at the super market or the right blush at the make-up counter.
The smart woman is the ultimate educated consumer, the one who Knows what she needs and won't settle for anything less especially
when she is shopping for a man, McDonald said recently in her Sarasota home.
Single well into her 30s, McDonald has identified women¹s shopping gene. When she finally learned to identify what she herself was
looking for, she found her perfect man, Mike McDonald. Living happily ever after in a house they designed together in Bird Key, they are
living proof of her shopping skills.
Newly published by Cesario Publishing, the book will be available At major book stores across the country beginning on Oct. 22. Her first
Book signing will be that afternoon in Venice at The Book Shop, 241 W. Venice Ave., at 2 p.m. At 7 p.m. that evening McDonald will be at
Sarasota News & Books to sign books. Also available for purchase and signing is her first book, Ladies, If Your Horse is Dead, Dismount.
McDonald, a motivational speaker, knows how to cut to the chase, literally, charging right in to the heart of the subject at hand, be it dead
horses (i.e. relationships that have died) or shopping, something that is especially dear to her heart. She was a few minutes late for our
appointment because ³she had to run over to the mall. her husband said. Although she has found her perfect husband, it seems she is
continuing to hone those shopping skills.
Delivered with a sense of humor that doesn¹t quit, McDonald uses The analogy of shopping for a new outfit to guide women through the
steps needed to find the right man. She begins at the beginning, suggesting a good closet cleaning to get rid of one¹s old and tired
emotional wardrobe of old relationships and old ideas to deciding just what kind of man she really wants, and even scouting the likely
places she will find him.
Women are the superior sex when it comes to shopping, with one exception: shopping for a mate, she writes in Chapter 2. But then, after
asking her readers to make a list of the love of Their life, i.e. the perfect man, she bursts their bubble. We are not looking for the perfect
man, she writes. He doesn¹t exist,because this is a dream list. Wake up.
Wide awake, and with a clean closet and shopping list, it is time To head for the the department store, the boutique and the consignment
shop. McDonald takes her readers to such places as the Jiffy Lube on Saturday mornings, boat shows, wine tastings, the local Harley-
Davidson dealer, Toys R Us and the Porsche showroom.
One need only look at some of the book’s chapter headings to Realize that this lady knows shopping: Window Shopping, Your Personal
Shopper, The Marketing Plan, Buyer Beware!, The Fitting Room, Shopping Online, Going Out of Business, Alterations, Cash or Charge?
and The Final Purchase.
Like her book, McDonald is organized and comfortable. Although she has a separate and quite elegant office at the back of Her two-story
house, McDonald is more likely to take her Dell laptop into the living room when she is writing. Her uniform is the same one she often
wears for speaking engagements, bright-colored turtle-themed pajamas.
Sometimes when I am speaking to large groups I ask them if they mind if I get comfortable, she said. Then I go behind a screen and come
out in my pajamas and fuzzy slippers That gets their attention but it also puts everyone at ease and is Part of the reason her speaking
engagements draw hundreds of people to hear what she has to say.
Clad in those same pajamas and curled up on the sofa with her two Shetland sheep dogs Scoop and Dover, she pens her books.
When she is in her home office it is to print chapters for proofing Or to plan marketing strategies, work on power point presentations or
Speaking engagements or accomplish any of the other jobs of an author/motivational speaker. At home, at a book signing and even within
the pages of her books, McDonald¹s warmth and caring personality comes through, and, within the pages of this latest book, excellent
suggestions for networking, ways to narrow the shopping lists and how to schedule brief 15-minute coffee breaks that could develop into
later first dates. The book empowers women to use a methodical but fun approach to what may be the most important decision of their life.
While doing her research for the book, McDonald came up with a bonus. Purchasers of the book are eligible for a free, no-obligation, one-
month trial membership from perfectmatch.com‹a $59.95 value.
Did I mention she also has another office and a day job? With 20 Years experience presenting workshops and motivational programs to
private, corporate, nonprofit and public audience, McDonald is the chief executive officer of a motivational consulting firm headquartered in
Sarasota but with customers across the country. Future books will continue her self-help theme and will generally be geared to men or
women stuck in bad relationships as well as anyone stuck in their career or life situation. To learn more about the author, visit www.
shoppingskills.com.
Shopping skills can land man
By STEVE ECHEVERRIA JR.
steve.echeverria@heraldtribune.com
Lynn McDonald wants to take single women everywhere on the shopping trip of their lives.
"Women, I truly believe, have shopping genes," the Sarasota author said in a recent telephone interview. "They could shop for anything,
including their perfect guy."
Shopping skills and instinct are the most effective tools women have in searching for their ideal mates, according to McDonald, author of
the new book "How to Use Your Shopping Skills to Get a Man" (BookWorld, $14.95).
With practical coaching and plenty of humor, the 128-page book uses the idea of shopping for a new outfit to guide women to find the right
man.
"I tell women, 'Let's take out your want and make it a need,'" she said. "Women have to understand there are so many different products out
there, and aisles and aisles of different choices."
McDonald knows those choices well.
A motivational speaker for the past twenty years, the 51-year-old spent decades roaming the relationship sales racks.
Before marrying her husband 12 years ago, she had been dating a man for seven years. "He was a nice person, but he wasn't what I
needed, and I settled for less than what I deserved," she said.
Now she wants to help other women avoid the same pitfalls.
luxury hotels in BordeauxThe idea for "How to Use Your Shopping Skills" came to McDonald eight months ago, she said, while walking the aisles of a grocery store.
"I hadn't had lunch and stopped at the store, but I didn't have a shopping list, and you know what happens when you go to a store without a
list," she said. "I realized, 'Oh my God, if you go shopping for groceries without a list, you leave with junk food.'"
McDonald decided to give single women a step-by-step action plan.
"The book gives direction on how to be proactive," she said. "The knight in shining armor doesn't exist. I don't see any horses on the street
Oslo hôtelsanymore, but there is a perfect man for you that you can shop for."
Between chapter titles "Cleaning Out Your Emotional Closet" and "The Final Purchase," McDonald suggests that women examine old
relationships, decide what kind of man they really want, scout places to find men, and change their appearance occasionally.
"If you haven't changed your hairdo in one year, you're not 'new and improved'; if you haven't changed your makeup in a quarter year, you're
not 'new and improved,'" she said. "So even though you're shopping for the man that's perfect for you, you also have to
. . . have to have the ultimate look because you are the ultimate product."
Other tips McDonald suggests are getting a shopping buddy and not overlooking cyberspace storefronts.
Still, she said, it all comes back to that list.
"If you ask women to make a list, they list what they want, not what they need," she said. "Stop looking for the perfect guy you think you need
and start looking for your perfect guy."
Top stops to shop
Author Lynn McDonald said there are several places to find quality men. Wine-tasting events and boat shows are just two easy
suggestions. Check out these other places:
1.) The Harley-Davidson dealership: "You know how expensive those big toys are? Most of the guys riding those big toys are professionals
and save for those big toys. They also give to others with their Teddy Bear runs. Go volunteer at an event."
2.) Toys "R" Us: "The last minute before the holidays, you see guys roaming the aisles. Some women might say, 'Oh, they are divorcees.'
But I say: 'You like shopping at a consignment shop, don't you?'"
3.) Jiffy Lube on a Saturday morning: "These guys have arrived financially." Presumably they can afford to pay someone else to change their
car's oil.
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